1. 看完了Janet Malcolm 40年前的书《Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession》, 或许也是在恰当的时间点, 简直是及时雨。对于真正想贴近了解这个职业的读者来说, 这本以访谈为基础的书的确不能错过, 涉及诸多敏感的核心问题, 直言不讳的犀利讨论, 让人受益匪浅。我的人生中一个里程碑似的的时刻, 这本书留下了抹不去的烙印。

"Aren't there patients who can't accept the idea that their love or hatred for the analyst is a reliving of the past?"

"Most patients can't."

"But finally you have to convince them-- as Freud wrote regarding the case of transference love --that they are not in love with you personally, that their love is an illusion."

"That's become the conventional wisdom on the subject. It's a defense maneuver that many analysts adopt when all of a sudden they find themselves caught within the emotional field of the patient's instincts, when they feel the full impact of the transference beating down on them like hail. But I don't agree with it. No, you don't convince the patient that It's not you she loves. Freud was off base when he wrote that. It is you. Who else could it be? ……There is only one thing for the analyst to say to the patient who has fallen in love with him, in one way or another, that is 'Tell me more about it. Say whatever comes into your mind about it. Let's go into it deeper. Let's learn about the nature of your love.' Now, the patient may not listen to him. She may be so overwhelmed by her feelings, ……, that she will not be willing or able to examine her love, and when this happens the analyst is in trouble, not because the analyst has been forced into a compromised position, but because the patient is no longer attending to her associations. The operation has come to a standstill."

2. "As psychoanalysts, we are only too aware that our profession is not only impossible but also extremely difficult. "

"A psychoanalyst is a person who gets to know another person very intimately but doesn't have to involved with her/him. "

"To love somebody is the best way to mislead her or to deceive her about her own lack. "

3. "心理分析疗愈的关键是, transference发生后, 逐步将童年被压抑的对父母的怨恨以及无意识里埋藏的相关的materials激发挖掘出来, 分析师必须拒绝给予她们没有从父母那里得到、又一直desire的东西, 否则无意识中的压抑就无从激发出来, 假如爱和温暖取代了失望和愤怒, 分析和疗愈反而必定失败了, 因为童年压抑、遗忘的materials没有机会被激发出来。"

"从弗洛伊德开始, 一代又一代的分析师, 总是重复这样的经历: 一个异性做分析, 或者一旦距离靠近transference发生了之后, 很快她们说, 我爱上你了, 然后接下来开始发泄怨恨, 其实是童年被压抑的对父母的怨恨, "你为什么对我不好? 为什么这么冷漠?" 男人对女分析师也是同样。童年的经历必须被重新经历。为了激活和挖掘压抑的根源, 分析师必须保持中立, 尤其不能给予爱。人们对容器的理解通常偏差了。除非严重的borderline和psychosis, 分析师早期要充当好妈妈的角色, 其他情况下分析师必须保持中立, 激活病人把被压抑的、未曾表达出来的对父母的怨恨, 发泄在分析师自己身上, 这时爱和温暖只会起阻碍作用。"

"另一方面, 分析师不可卷入与analysand的私人关系, 恋爱绝对不可以, 恰恰因为爱误导她以为自己找到了幼年父母不能给予、才一直欲望的东西, 于是一直处于压抑状态的对父母的怨恨就无从表达了。"

"浪漫爱情的幻象必须结束, 因为幼年母婴的疏离是必然的, 这个疏离是必须如实接受的bedrock of existence. 没有任何一个人能补上这个疏离造成的欠缺感。寄托爱情让自己完整的渴望, 就是普遍的症状。"

4. 哲人石的心理分析介绍课“Why Psychoanalysis”, 说明了前俄狄浦斯 vs. 俄狄浦斯、弗洛伊德 vs. Ferenczi 这两个有平行关系的贯穿整个分析实践历史中根本争议的议题。就分析师是否严格保持中立来说, 弗洛伊德、克莱因夫人和拉康站在一边, 而Ferenczi算是修正派的始祖和象征人物。

人们普遍太渴望遇到理想父母般的疗愈老师, 迷恋能在严格分析之外能提供爱、温暖和各种自体客体功能的帮助了, 可是除非公认的源于前俄狄浦斯阶段的匮乏的困难案例, 即严重的自恋创伤、borderline和psychotics在早期可能需要温暖包容的容器功能之外, 爱、温暖和其他帮助恰恰是让分析失败的错误。弗洛伊德在哀悼Ferenczi的时候遗憾地说, 这位心地善良的老朋友误入歧途了。

"the insights of psychoanalysis are never taken for granted from one generation to the next. Each generation has to make the original discoveries afresh. ……Why can't the next generation accept what Freud found out? "

5. 对心理分析及其价值理解得越多, 就更会明白, 真正觉得有紧迫性、而且有决心和勇气去探索自己的无意识心灵真相的人很少。内在小孩的欠缺造成难以克服的阻抗, 接受分析需要人已经具备一定的成熟度。在一个人无意识里还在努力捍卫自己的存在感和价值的时候, 分析过程总会遭遇难以突破的瓶颈。

Psychoanalysis is an impossible profession. 分析只能在职业界限内进行, 在生活中分析师要时刻克制自己的分析兴趣, 在他人没有正式求助的时候, 对人们自然呈现的症状不做出任何反应, 更不去解读他人的症状。隐藏在黑暗中的东西, 轻易不要去揭开。